Thursday, May 10, 2007

1. ask your potential landlord if he allows pets before packing all of you and your friend’s shit into a truck and driving it 3 and a half hours to a new city.

2. windex is best for cleaning smoke residue off from everything in the new place, because the person who lived there before you never opened a window and smoked a minimum of10 packs a day.

3. unsecured wireless networks kick ass!! (this update is brought to you courtesy of someone on this block, most likely the dude with the big ass plasma screen watching this week’s Lost)

4. never let the lady who works for the gas company into the building, especially when everyone else in the building is stealing gas; it seems that they will shut them off and that makes a great first impression. (“hi, my name’s cole and i’m sorry that we got your free gas shut off.”)

5. always, and i mean always, make sure that your chain is tight. I know, you’re thinking, “ahhh, it will be alright”; but you might end up hitting some bumps which cause your chain to explode into 3 pieces, locking up you rear wheel almost killing you. The three mile walk home in clipless shoes wasn’t all that (or a bag of chips).

5.5 always carry cash so if number five happens you can take a train home. if you’re a big spender there’s always the cab option. i am not a big spender. you need to have something to be able to spend it, right? living in the city isn’t cheap.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

4.5 Transvestites can give me ride home if the chain comes apart.

Anonymous said...

LOVE it!! seen you on criagslist

Keep up the great work!

Anonymous said...

that's awesome you guys made it...my chain split a few weeks ago too, but i had a healthy 6 more miles to walk and unfortunatly i don't work near a train.
pretty awesome...welcome to chicago.

Anonymous said...

demon hell ride

Unknown said...

White vinegar works as well as windex without as much fumes....

And I LOVE unsecured wireless....

Or I used to, I got kicked off of mine almost a year ago. *$%#!!!